Chris Deckard ~ Fictional Insight

Received 6/15/25

"You’ve created an incredibly rich and layered world here. The setting (Paris at a pivotal historical and cultural moment) is not just beautifully realized but thematically charged. You ground us in a place where empire, innovation, and artistic identity collide, and that’s an exciting foundation for a series. From the chaos of rejection day outside the Louvre to the boulevards gleaming under Haussmann’s renovations, every scene feels carefully composed and purposeful. It’s clear you’ve done your research, but more than that, you know how to channel it into tone, mood, and metaphor.

Your writing voice is confident, lyrical, and often painterly in the best way. Moments like Manet’s walk with Leon, or the final tableau with Déjeuner sur l’Herbe, aren’t just descriptive—they’re cinematic, emotionally resonant, and deeply tied to theme. Several characters come in strong, especially Manet, Victorine, Baudelaire, and the Sisley/Renoir pairing. Even in a large ensemble, these characters already show distinct personalities, compelling contradictions, and emotional textures that hint at deeper arcs. You’ve built a strong foundation here (visually, thematically, and tonally) that gives this project a clear artistic identity."

On the page, your writing has style and elegance. The script reads like it comes from someone with a strong sense of craft and voice. There aren’t any glaring formatting issues, and the dialogue is consistently clean in terms of punctuation and layout. When you lean into cinematic description (especially moments tied to light, color, and motion) it’s clear you’re thinking visually, which is a great strength.

Your focus on the rebellious origins of Impressionism and the emotional cost of breaking from tradition places this show in strong thematic company with hits like THE QUEEN’S GAMBIT or GENIUS: PICASSO. The script’s intellectual depth and cultural relevance could also appeal to streamers like Netflix, HBO, or Apple TV+, who continue to invest in high-end, visually ambitious storytelling that reflects on legacy, genius, and systemic change.

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Big Break Screenwriting Contest

5/28/25, Historical Genre

"The Refused, Episode 1, Beginning with Manet: An impassioned sort of historical narrative, full of tumultuous politics, inspired dreamers, and an artistic community at a crossroads, this script is well-written and sincere in its expression. Conceptually speaking, even if the viewer does not know the Impressionists as well as one might, it’s still plain given the confluence of factors involved here that something notable is taking shape, a kind of conflict that is sure to move not only visual art but art of all kinds artistic movements. The manner in which the characters refer to the pressing existential matters of their time helps in giving meaning to this sense of importance, as meditations on the struggle of “modernity” give something of a sounding board against which the Impressionists can cast their discomfort and alienation. This story is at its best when it is leaning into a visual representation of that disquiet, as with the red letters at the beginning of the script or in the midst of the Hausmann assassination attempt. The point at which the lived reality of these characters clashes with their higher ideals does make for some great drama, and this representation of said drama is frequently successful in bringing it all to life. The ensemble is also of a largely compelling sort, as more libertine figures as Baudelaire frequently bump against the sterner sort, as in Manet. Those contrasts are powerful in their representation."

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The Golden Script Competition 

May 2024

"The Refused has a fantastic concept that explores a profound topic, and it could also serve as an academic art history lesson. We are happy to have the chance to read the script, as it's rare to encounter such eruditeness in the way the story is written and the subject explored through portraying the most prominent people that changed the world.

The Refused includes many important people from history, and overall, the story is character-driven, making this category the unique selling point. There aren't any fiction films/series on Manet, only documentaries, and that's why it's important to see the script turned into a series. All in all, the characters are very well done, especially the protagonist. The dialogue captures the period, and it makes it even more authentic. The characters don’t talk in standardized language, which is great and avoids arousing suspense. Moreover, the dialogue enriches the story with a voice-over, and there’s one scene specifically that’s outstanding in the way it’s executed – Edouard’s correspondence with his father through doodles.

It’s not only the fact that Edouard Manet is one of the most controversial artists whose life hasn't been portrayed on the big screen, but the fact that the story talks about a specific period in history and Manet’s life. It describes what the Salon system means at that time, and it includes a combination of characters that’s rare to find anywhere else."

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